Have you ever held a clear view on what to do about an issue, but you held back on sharing it because you thought you might be ridiculed? And later hear that very same view being later held up by the leaders as the right way to go?


Or maybe you’ve found yourself at the other end of the spectrum. That time where you confidently shared your opinions about the way forward is, only to have completely missed the mark because you didn’t take into account the full picture?


If you’re like me, you’ll probably recall times where you’ve been in both of these situations. And you’ve probably got a tendency towards one or the other.


Over the past few weeks, I’ve listened to a number of stories from clients who find themselves wishing they’d either spoken up, or shut up.


How do you know when to be quiet, and when to put it out there?


I reckon we can get paralysed between two poles:


We don’t want to be seen as arrogant. Because nobody likes a know-it-all.


Yet we don’t want to be seen as ignorant either. We’re paid to have a view, right?


Both of these places are not ideal to hang out in. There’s a sweet spot we need to find between these two places.


That sweet spot is the place where you have confidence (in your views)…


…yet you also have a healthy dose of wonderance: the humility that you don’t know it all, and the curiosity to learn:


Just like riding a bike, or balancing on a see-saw, it requires constant micro-adjustments to get the balance right. Keep your radar tuned for what’s happening around you. Ask yourself “what’s needed here, now?” And if you find yourself perhaps going too far one way or the other, ask yourself “How might my ego be getting in the way right now?”




Get the balance right by knowing you know something worth sharing, and knowing you don’t know it all.


Balance confidence with wonderance.


PS I put a different spin on this idea back in 2017 with a post called ‘How To Be Curious’. Enjoy that too ?


PPS Thanks to the brilliant Kate Forsyth for the see-saw idea ?




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